Member-only story
Unless You’re A Photographer, Stop Telling Others To ‘Smile!’
Instructing others — especially strangers — to smile is an insidious form of emotional policing that needs to end.
Several years ago, when I lived in Memphis, I used to take long walks along the banks of the Mississippi River to clear my head. One day as I was walking along the riverbank deep in thought, a guy passed by me and said “Smile man! It’s not that bad!”
I’m sure this stranger did not mean me any offense. He could not have known about the personal and professional turbulence I was experiencing in my life at the time.
I suppose in his mind, he was feeling cheerful and wanted to spread some joy to some dude he felt probably needed it.
He should have minded his own business.
I have always chaffed at the notion of telling other people to “Smile!” because I think it is very presumptuous and arrogant.
We live in a culture where pop psychology espousing the miraculous merits of positivity and self-help rule the zeitgeist. The self-help industry hauls in billions of dollars a year in book sales, seminars, workshops, courses, life coaching, and talks by gurus — many with dubious credentials.
