God, this really resonated with me. A few years ago, I ended a near-20-year friendship because I realized our relationship was based on my doing whatever the other person wanted,whenever they wanted it. Then, I had the tendency to be a people-pleaser, but one day this individual made an irrational and inappropriate request of me and expected me to”hop to it.” I refused, the relationship ended, and though it’s unfortunate because we knew each other for so long, I have zero regrets. You are so spot-on about not doing all the heavy lifting in relationships because when you do, it becomes a situation in which you are being controlled and not about having a real connection to someone else. THANK YOU for articulating this truth so brilliantly.